Bridging the Gap to Heal - Body,Mind,Spirit: Personal Story...

Personal Story...

I have been called a "tough chick", "survivor", "inspirational", and other positive adjectives that, truthfully, make me feel a little uncomfortable.  Over the 16 years since I have been living with chronic illness that has ranged  from manageable to completely debilitating, there have been many times that doctors, nurses, and "normal" people have made comments about how they don't know how I manage to maintain my smile, (mostly) positive outlook, and fighting spirit.  They have said, "If I were you, I don't think I could do that...".  I always looked at them and said, "Sure you could...you just learn how to cope with the ups and downs and move forward the best you can each day...some times it is one second at a time, some days it is better and you can do it one day at a time, but you never stop believing that the next day will be better in some way."

 

Then it happened...after all that time...so many different diagnoses, so many different trials and errors of medications, so many infections due to a weakened immune system, that I just kind of gave up.  I stopped believing in better times.  I was stuck in a rut.  I had tried all the "traditional" medications.  I had seen all the different "ologists" in my area and there seemed to be nothing they could do to help my pain and flares from SLE, mast cell disease, autonomic dysfunction, severe osteoporosis, migraines, tonic muscle spasms, seven compression fractures in my spine, etc....

 

It was then I saw my pulmonary doctor for a check up and he suggested I seek out alternative treatments (nothing I would ingest or that would manipulate my spine and make the fractures worse), so I figured, if it can't hurt me, it can only help!  I first tried the more traditional route of hypnosis for pain management through a psychologist.  I learned a few great techniques that help me to this day for reducing my pain during migraine headaches and easing tension in my muscles.  I then moved onto more guided meditations  that I learned while admitted to the hospital for what the doctors suspected was a stroke/neurologic event that caused swallowing difficulty and my tongue to pull to one side of my mouth.  The speech pathologist noticed right away that the issue was caused by a tonic spasm in my throat, which was pulling my tongue to one side.  The guided meditation allowed my body and throat muscles to relax enough for my tongue to move back to center.  She was then able to teach me the proper exercises to keep those muscles relaxed and get stronger.  (The issue was stemming from my neck and neuro-toxic reaction to medications, not a stroke). 

I still use the guided meditation often to help relax my muscles and keep me feeling peaceful and balanced...especially when in a flare or lowering prednisone.

 

There was a time when I had to stop all pain medications cold turkey due to allergic reactions to inactive ingredient changes.  After being on them for so long, this was extremely difficult and dangerous.  I was mentally and physically drained.  My Mom suggested I try Reiki...she knows a woman who lives with a chronic illness of her own and is a Reiki Master to help others cope with their pain, both physical and emotional.  While this was not the first time I had heard of Reiki, it was the first time I seriously considered it as an option.  I figured it couldn't hurt, and I was DESPERATE for relief.  I was in so much pain I was in a wheelchair, where before I could walk without assistance. 

 

When I went into her office for the first time, it looked like any other psychologist's office, so I felt at ease...it wasn't so "woo woo".  She spoke to me first about what I wanted to get out of the session.  I told her that I just wanted to feel more at ease, less pain, and more relaxed (I was super anxious from the withdrawals...depression and anxiety at the same time as horrible pain is a miserable combination!).  She had me lie down in a comfortable position on her couch and just close my eyes and relax.  I could FEEL the coolness from her hands, tingling where I hurt the most, and SEE beautiful colors that were so calming.  I noticed when the session was over, that the atmosphere in the room had changed from charged with my anxiety to completely calm and relaxed.  My pain level dropped from a solid 10 to a 6, which was amazing in just one session. 

 

I saw her once a week, and we talked more and more in depth about Reiki, adding crystals into our sessions, noticing that they enhanced the pain relief and calmness I felt.  I became very interested in this mode of healing...I even noticed that as we talked about Reiki, MY hands started tingling.  By this point (a few weeks into our sessions, and off all pain medications), I was using a 3 wheeled walker instead of a wheelchair, and I decided to try to do a mini-session on my Mom, trying to replicate what I felt my therapist do to me on her.  It was like my hands were being guided to the correct spots by tingling and heating up where she was feeling pain or discomfort (my Mom also has SLE, Sjogren's Syndrome, and NMO).  

 

My Mom noticed that I had a "gift" for healing, and saw an advertisement on line to become a Reiki Master.  It was a "go at your own pace", type of course, so I wouldn't have to worry about deadlines for assignments or quizzes, which is my concern since my illnesses can be very unpredictable.  I agreed to try out the course since I WAS very interested in Reiki, and I am so glad I did!  Through this course, I not only became a certified Reiki Master/teacher, I also learned how to hone my skills as a healer, keep calm and emotionally balanced, self-heal, ask for help when I need it, and be more self-aware/intuitive.  I am also constantly learning new skills and techniques. 

 

This alternative path has led me to my true path in life.  After feeling "stuck" for so long, it took one doctor, one suggestion that was a little outside the "norm", to shake me out of the rut in which I was living.  I am still on traditional medications, still see regular doctors, and am by no means saying that alternative methods are a "cure all", but I feel they bridge the gap between conventional medications and ancient (and new) alternative treatments.   

I will be uploading links to free webinars on my Facebook page (link below), with different alternative methods that work WITH traditional treatments  :)  All webinars will also be on the Lupus Foundation of America, Florida Chapter's social media's sites, as well.  I hope you will follow along my journey of healing...

Please feel free to follow my Facebook page:  Bridging the Gap to Heal - Body,Mind,Spirit - Facebook link
and
Lupus Foundation of America, Florida Chapter

Down Goes the Seesaw

After doing well "trying" and yes, actually "doing" throughout the month of November, I developed kidney stones in December.  These stones triggered a lupus flare, in which I had no choice but to up my prednisone dose from 15 mg to 30 mg in order to keep breathing. 

I decided to stay on this dose until after my sister's wedding, so I would not flare again during her special time.  I did remarkably well during the wedding weekend, even though I passed at least one of the stones (which was incredibly painful!).  It was wonderful to spend time with my family, and to meet Dave's (my new brother-in-law) family. 

The only issue was that everyone at the wedding, and pre-wedding party, was sick with colds and the flu/bronchitis.  Due to people coughing and sneezing around me, about four days after coming home, I developed signs of a sinus/upper respiratory infection.  I started on antibiotics right away...but it was not enough...and neither was the 30 mg of prednisone. 

Two days after starting the antibiotics I needed to go to the emergency room, which was packed with incredibly sick people.  Thankfully, the doctors put me in a private room while we waited 9 hours.  I was given IV steroids and valium to help ease my breathing.  My color was a grayish/blue when I went in, but improved enough after the medication that I was able to go home on 50 mg of prednisone. 

I was horribly sick for a full two weeks, so I was unable to lower the dose of prednisone during that time.  Last week was the first time I was able to drop...down to 40 mg...and 30 mg this week.  I am back where I started during the kidney stone flare.  Each week I am high dose prednisone, my body and mind seem to rebel more and more. 

Depression and anxiety are not uncommon for those on high dose prednisone, and I am no exception.  I know what is causing these feelings, and yet it does not make it much easier to handle.  I have to keep reminding myself that it WILL get better, that I have done this many times before and gotten through the torture. 

Sometimes I wonder if this will always be my life...this constant up and down in both mood and health.  I try to steer clear of these particular thoughts...they do nothing but make the depression worse.  I attempt to focus on the fact that I was able to lower two doses successfully and with less pain (though I do get migraines for a few days during each drop).  I really do try to numb my mind...to do whatever possible when I feel well enough.  I managed to get out a little this past weekend, and even on the day that I lowered this week.  The weather is so beautiful right now, and it is such a shame to stay locked in the house. 

I just want this nightmare to be done...I want the Up on the seesaw.  I need to keep reminding myself that it will happen.  I will not let the prednisone win.  I will not let the depression keep me down.  Each time I drop on prednisone will cause me to need this reminder...the reminder that I will prevail and thrive...eventually.

Trying...

This title may seem too simplistic, but it can mean so many things: how my health has been trying my patience, how I am trying so hard to find motivation to DO something, how I am trying to regulate medications and even how I am trying to push my limits physically.  I do not think a person could TRY any harder.

My five day seizure study showed that the episodes of tonic spasms, breathing problems and syncope are caused by the muscles in my neck spasming while trying to protect my spine.  The EEG was completely normal during the episodes, so I am not having actual seizures.  The doctors then ordered two MRIs (cervical and thorasic spine), which I had to be sedated in order to endure the length of time needed to complete the tests.  With the seven compression fractures not healing well, getting worse in some places, causing kyphosis (curving of my spine), and atelectysis (squishing of the base of my lungs and reducing my lung capacity), my neck/back muscles are trying to compensate by spasming when they become too fatigued.  The neurologist suggested I wear a soft c-collar to support my neck during the day and use a soft neck pillow when I sleep.  She hoped that this would ease the obvious tension in my neck and reduce the frequency/severity of my spasms. 

This seemed like it was starting to work, to some degree, as my spasms and pain levels did in fact decrease in frequency, though not severity.  I was still having episodes while on my two week vacation with my family in Sanibel Island.  Thankfully I only had a couple of episodes, and only one day where I was indoors the entire day.  I did much more physically then I ever thought possible.  I am very proud of myself that I was able to walk on the beach, go in the pool, and even hold a fishing pole for a short time.  I did all of these things without using my walker once.  I found that while wearing the c-collar I am able to go longer without feeling the burning in my neck/back that inevitably leads to spasms.  Here is a picture of me during our vacation and a short video from a morning at Blind Pass on Sanibel....it was so beautiful and my parents caught quite a few fish this year! 

 

I also started taking valium when I first start to feel my aura. While this does not prevent attacks, it does shorten the length of time they last.

When we came home, I started pulmonary rehab and found I am able to do much more exercise then I thought I would be possible.  I am slowly working my way to stronger muscles, which will hopefully also help prevent attacks as the muscles will not have to work as hard to support my spine.  I am also trying a new muscle relaxant in the hopes of preventing episodes, so I take this medication three times a day.  It is designed to work directly on the spine/brain stem to relax the nerves that send signals to my muscles.  So far it is working well, but we are still adjusting the dose to see what works best.  I feel a bit like a chemistry set again, as I tried to lower my chemotherapy medication and flared big time.  Apparently, it is working after all...I was not sure that was the case. 

I have also been trying to go out more often to do FUN things.  I want to start enjoying life to the fullest.  I am tired of being scared of these attacks...tired of feeling like I have to fight for everything.  I want to RELAX and ENJOY.  So far I have been able to do this for short bursts of time.  It makes me hunger for more of those times. 

I am definitely TRYING and HOPING for more ups on this seesaw I call life.  So many things to look forward to in the next couple of months.  My family and I NEED this happiness and hope that is shining ahead of us.  I feel it is just out of reach, and I am trying to grab a hold of it with both hands! 

I am a FIGHTER...

Life has been the epitome of a seesaw in the past few months since the dreaded "TIA" episode.  The thing that is scariest is that the episodes are coming closer together, almost daily, are more severe in nature because they impact my breathing.  It seems I can squeek air in, but then the air gets "stuck" for around 5-6 seconds before finally choking out slowly.  It FEELS like a hand is wrapped around my throat and squeezing. Sometimes I have to remind myself to breathe at all.  That is extremely scary because there are times when I am completely unconscious and have NO control over my breathing. 

I am lucky that at least one parent is always around, so I am never alone during an attack. I take my medication as soon as I can swallow, which I try to do as soon as I feel it coming, to try to prevent it from getting too severe.  It is a problem that I only get about a minute or two warning.  It is not enough time for the medication to start working, but at least I get to swallow it before the choking/fainting begins. 

Yesterday was an example of how these attacks are unpredictable.  My Mom and I went shopping for pajamas with buttons on top, because I am going to be admitted to the hospital next week for a three-five day seizure study (complete with video EEG/cardiac/pulse-oxygen monitoring), and I was told that I could wear my own clothes as long as the tops had buttons or zippers (nothing over the head).  I was glad they allow me to be comfortable!  We found some very comfy pajamas at Kohl's and got great deals with coupons. 

My Mom and I then decided to stop for some lunch at one of our favorite local deli's.  As soon as we sat down she asked if I felt alright...I told her I was kind of tired and sore from trying on clothes, but was okay.  I should have listened to her.  She knew by looking at my eyes that something was wrong.  Right after eating I started feeling my "aura"...my head started to tingle and I got VERY tired and fuzzy feeling along with muscle spasms in my back.  I immediately took my medication and my Mom went to pay the check.  I was LUCKY to make it to the car before I fainted and went into spasms. 

My Mom has video recording of my attacks, and has shown my neurologist, and other doctors, which is why I am going in for the study. The neurologist does not think it LOOKS like a seizure, but he said he has been wrong before from just looking at a video, and the same has been true when he looks as a video and thinks it IS a seizure and it turns out NOT to be one.  He said that any neurologist will say the same thing, since there are so many different types of seizures and brain activities they look at during the study.  If it is NOT a seizure, then he will do an MRI of my cervical spine and possibly my thorasic spine (with contrast), to see if there are any lesions or demylenating issues.  This made me feel more comfortable because he is not giving up if this one study comes up normal (which I think it will).

I was upset that I was unable to attend the Walk to End Lupus Now 2014, which was last weekend.  I had flu like symptoms/high fever/spasms/fainting/ I also fractured my 9th and 10th ribs from coughing and being "sick", along with having such severe osteoparosis.  I am just happy that I did not have to up my prednisone to get through the illness.  I think that is a first...

Although I did not attend the walk, my team did manage to raise about $1,000.  I am VERY proud to have donated that amount to The Lupus Foundation of America, Florida Chapter.  We are an incredible chapter that is reenergizing with new, incredible board members, that I was fortunate enough to meet last night.  My parents were wonderful, and took/stayed with me to my board meet/greet.  I know it is not their forte to share their feelings and story with groups of people.  That is MY thing, and yet they did it for me.  My parents stayed the whole time, listened and shared...and their support means more to me then they will EVER know!!

I know my Mom wants the Board to be something "just for me"...and I appreciate that, but I also love that she involves herself whenever I ask.  My Dad is not a "sharer"...and yet he did that for ME...it is the little things like that keep me strong and keep me moving forward when I just want to throw my hands up. 

This video by Christina Aguilera, Fighter, has become my new anthem...I am a FIGHTER because of what is going on in my body. I will NOT forget what has happened, but I will allow it to make me a STRONGER person...I am trying very hard to not allow my illness or fear to run my life, so I keep this song in the back of my mind, and play it often as a reminder.  I AM A FIGHTER!  I have been through so much and I keep going...

I will update everyone after my seizure study next week.

The Seesaw of My Life - One Week Up...One Week Down...Looking Up Again

In the past few weeks I have had my true ride on the Lupus seesaw.  I had an incredible time at my cousin's wedding in Roxbury, NY. The location was beautiful, seeing my family was incredible, and my body cooperated enough for me to have a wonderful time at all of the events.  I was able to do more then I ever thought possible!  I even danced at the wedding (something I NEVER thought I would be able to do again, given my back fractures), but not only was I able to dance, I was able to do it with little pain!!  I was mindful of my limitations and made sure to listen to my body, and because of this, my parents and I had a fantastic trip.

 

The day after we came home I had an appointment to start the bone-building medication, Forteo. I had researched this medication, and my doctors and I all agreed this was the only medication that seemed to "fit". It is a daily injection, given for only two years.  There are no preservatives that would harm me...so we went ahead with the plan to start the medication in the doctor's office, just in case I had a reaction. I am not a huge fan of sticking myself with a needle, but it is a subcutaneous shot, so the needle is very thin and it came in a pen, so it was a premeasured dose and very easy to handle. I was able to complete the injection into my stomach with no real problem. About thirty minutes after the injection I realized that the site burned, so I lifted my shirt to look at the site, and noticed that there was a VERY red, VERY angry looking red circle that came away from the injection site, along with a red line that went from the site to box in the circle.  I knew this was NOT a good sign. I showed the nurse, who promptly went to get the doctor. She was not pleased with this, and made me stay for another hour to make sure I was not going to have any other reaction. After the hour, the redness had receeded a little, and I was feeling fine, so she let me go home...and instructed me to go to the ER if I felt any worse. If the redness had gone completely and nothing else happened, I was to come back the next day for my next injection. If not, I was to wait a week and we would try it again.

 

 

About three hours later, I looked at the site, and noticed that the redness had almost completely faded. I was relieved because I was having no other symptoms. I figured I would go back the next day for another injection. Oh how wrong I was...because forty-five minutes later it felt like I just got off the tea-cup ride from Disney World, I was SO dizzy. Then the vomitting began...and it would not stop long enough for me to take medication that would help the other symptoms I was beginning to experience: muscle spasms, fainting, and throat spasms. I could barely breath. I knew I had to go to the ER because there was NO way I would be able to take my medication that would open my throat with the way I was vomitting. 

 

 

My parents drove me to Cleveland Clinic, which is where I had the injection that morning, so the records were in the computer about what happened.  The ER doctor was very concerned because this reaction started with a skin reaction and then went systemic...so they gave me the cocktail, despite my protests that they just try zofran and valium first. He said that my choice was epinephrin AND solu-medrol or just solu-medrol along with zofran, benedryl, and valium...I relented and took the one without the epinephrin because of how high my heart rate goes on epi, and how difficult it is to bring it back DOWN.  I was afraid of another stroke if they shot my heart rate up that high.  Well, despite NOT getting the epi, I had a neurologic event that resembled a TIA. About thirty minutes after receiving the medications (which were given ALL at the same time...talk about a whammy), my left side went completely weak and I got very confused.  It was difficult to concentrate on what the doctor was saying, although I am not sure if that was from fear, medication, or the event itself.  The doctor said he was going to intubate me (put a breathing tube in), if I did not improve or if my breathing became more labored. I was extremely frightened at that point.

 

They rushed me into CT and that came back normal. My symptoms of left sided weakness completely resolved within fifteen minutes.  The doctors are not sure what happened...maybe the medications hitting me all at once, maybe a slight TIA, we just do not know.  I see my neurologist on Monday to discuss what happened. 

 

My breathing did not improve until three hours after the medications were given...and four afters the symptoms started.  I was exhausted! All the tests came back normal and all I wanted to do was GO HOME! The ER doctors wanted to keep me overnight for "observation", but I signed myself out...I could not stay there any longer and keep my sanity.  My Mom and I were over-tired and the ER was incredibly crowded.  We made it home and in bed just before midnight.

 

It has taken me about a week to start recovering from that horrific event.  I still am suffering from PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), and have flashbacks that wake me up at night and make it difficult for me to go back to sleep.  I am trying to remind myself that I am safe...I am home...I am still here...

 

Just writing about what happened shows that I am on the upswing...even as I have tears in my eyes writing this, I know that it is cathartic. I have to get it out and let it go.  That is the only way to move forward.  I made a promise to myself to stop being treated like a chemistry set.  I cannot move forward when the medications given to me blow me up and push me back.  I will stick with the medications I know work, eat the foods that do not make me ill, and do as much as I am physically able to keep myself strong...and that will make me stronger still. 

 

I am tired of the downs that life brings my way...I am ready for more time UP...this is the seesaw of my life. Some things I have control over, and what I put into my body is one of those things. I also control how I FEEL about what happens.  Of course I will have days when I feel sad, that is normal...but I want more days that are HAPPY. I want to enjoy the little things in life. That I can do...that I WILL do! Lupus, autonomic dysfunction, back fractures...they all change things, but I can still be happy with what I can DO. I have to focus on that...the rest will come with time.

Practice What I Preach - Life Post TIA

One week ago I suffered from a TIA, transient ischemic attack, or mini-stroke.  The only reason it stayed "mini" was due to the fact that I was able to notify my Mom, who called 9-1-1, VERY fast.  I was rushed to the nearest hospital where I was given TPA, the medication to dissolve clots and save the brain from permanent damage. 

We knew something was VERY wrong because when I woke up around 8 a.m., I had double vision and the room was spinning like I had been on the Teacup Ride. I closed my eyes and tried to relax, convincing myself that maybe I sat up too fast and my pressure shifted (though nothing like that had ever happened to me before). When I opened my eyes about a minute or so later, my vision had improved, though still blurry, and the room had stopped spinning, but my right side had gone heavy/limp/paralyzed.  I reached over and grabbed my cell phone to call my Mom on the house phone.  I then realized that I could not keep my head from flopping back towards the right, and my tongue was also shifted towards the right.  All I could say into the phone was a slurred "wrong".  My Mom came rushing into my room and she tried to do the typical neuro tests on me, that we know so well, and that I can usually do with no problems at all.  This time, however, I could none of them on the right side. When she asked me to smile, she knew something was terribly wrong...my mouth went up normally on the left, but stayed in a straight line on the right.  That was when she called for the ambulance.

I was EXTREMELY lucky! This medication can only be administered within the first three hours after exhibiting symptoms, and I was given the medication at the two and half hour mark.  My symptoms started improving each hour after that...slowly...starting with having more strength in my hands, and moving the right side of my mouth...the last thing to come back was the strength in my leg, which was back twenty-four hours after the TIA.  I was in the hospital a total of three days.

Picture when my mouth was finally starting to smile normally!

On the last day, the neurologist told me I NEEDED to take a blood thinner to prevent this from reoccurring.  The problem, I told her, is that I am allergic to NSAIDS. Last time I took one I had a Steven-Johnson reaction, which is a very serious skin rash that can turn deadly if left untreated, as sores can form on internal organs.  I was told by a dermatologist that I was LUCKY to be on steroids because it saved me from having a more serious reaction and organ damage.  Well, this neurologist believed that if I took a baby aspirin, only 81 mg, three times a week, specially compounded to have no inactive ingredients that could make me ill (since the OTC brands all have talc's and starches that irritate my lupus), I "should" be fine. 

I really need to start taking my own advice about being your own advocate!  I listened to this doctor...I had this aspirin compounded, paying $22.00 for fifteen pills of baby aspirin to hopefully prevent me from having future clots. She truly scared me that if I did not take this, another clot could, indeed happen.  I knew the risks, though...and I took the pill anyway.  Less then an hour after I took the aspirin I felt the burning/itching sensation up the back of my neck...it quickly went into my throat and into my nose and eyes.  My Mom took me back to the ER where I received an IM (intramuscular) injection of benedryl (which in my opinion does NOT work as quickly or effectively as IV benedryl), dissolvable zofran for the nausea (again, not as effective as IV), and my own muscle relaxant for my throat spasms, since they would not give me anything for that since I refused solu-medrol. 

I DID advocate for myself by refusing solu-medrol!  There was NO WAY I was getting another 125 mg injection of steroids and then a medrol-dose taper for a medication that is supposed to be out of the system in four hours.  I knew I needed the benedryl that went directly into the body...as my stomach does not absorb things properly on a normal basis, and I was so nauseous, I had no idea if I could keep down enough oral benedryl to make a difference.  The ER doctor did not seem pleased with me that I refused the steroids, just like the neurologist was not pleased when I told her I could not take aspirin.  I relented on the aspirin and put me right back in the ER with a severe allergic reaction!! 

From now on...I am not going to care what the doctors think about me!  I am going to SAVE MYSELF!!  They do not have to live in this body, I DO!  I will let them know the reasons as politely as possible, but I will not back down.  This is my life, and let me tell you, I WANT TO LIVE IT!  It is high time doctors learn to LISTEN to their patients, and understand we just want to LIVE and be HEALTHY with the LEAST amount of side effects possible!! 

A Coffee a Day to Keep the Fainting Away?!?

I have been sick with a sinus infection/upper respiratory infection for about a week now, on some seriously strong antibiotics and muscle relaxants to help with the spasms that wrack my body.  Every time I become sick, I faint...my muscles spasm uncontrollably, including my throat, making it very difficult to breath (especially when I have a respiratory infection).  While the muscle relaxants work, I know it is not good to take them continuously, and for long periods of time...because not only would I build up a tolerance, my body requiring more and more of a dose to achieve the same results, but it would be very difficult to stop the medication when I feel better. 

While most people would have gone to the hospital after experiencing the type of symptoms I had, I waited it out...hoping I would start to feel better.  I know that if I went to the hospital the doctors would, first and foremost, insist on putting me on high dose steroids to take down any inflammation.  This is such a common practice...and one I have experienced more times than I can count.  I know my body cannot handle another bout of high dose steroids...my bones will literally fall apart. I already have severe osteoporosis and multiple compression fractures in my spine, from years on the steroid seesaw.  I will not put my body through that torture again!

Yesterday I remembered something my pulmonologist told me years ago, when I stopped taking inhalers because of all the side effects...caffeine is just as effective a vasodilator as some of the inhalers.  It works to keep the airways open, the blood pressure and heart rate up, which can increase the oxygen levels in the blood. 
I figured, what the heck...I would give a cup of regular coffee a try. 

After I went for some blood work, my Mom and I stopped at Dunkin Donuts and I got a regular iced coffee...I added my almond milk and a couple of sugars at home, and was really surprised by the difference it made.  My breathing DID somewhat improve.

I drank the rest of the coffee this morning, and while I did have muscle spasms, I DID NOT FAINT!  My blood pressure and heart rate stayed up enough to keep me from fainting!  My airways opened up enough for me to breath a little easier after getting rid of some "junk" that was stuck in my airways  (sorry if that is too descriptive, but I want you to understand how this is working for me). 

I am by NO means saying this is for everyone, or that it is a wonder cure...but if it helps keep me from fainting, that would be HUGE!  Here is for hoping a cup of coffee a day can keep the fainting away!!